Do not Underestimate what a Resentful attitude can do to your relationship with Jesus Christ

At one time or another many of us have expressed a desire for something or someone. Whether the desire entails a specific food, location, time to pray, or attention from another person, the need to have these desires met is part of our human condition. We are created to experience both spiritual and physical desires that when properly ordered express genuine gratitude toward God our Father. The sense of gratitude further expands in the proclamation of faith in the Son Jesus Christ who as the second person of the Trinity is the source and summit of our Christian life.

The idea that our spiritual and physical desires are inherent by nature reflects the dynamic of how God envisioned our creation. Our first parents were made without the inclination to deviate from God’s love and thus experience a perfect sense of unity and communion with Him. In a sense, Adam and Eve had no reason to covet anything as we are told in Sacred Scripture, they were provided with everything except for the opportunity to take fruit from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil.[1]  

As the Divine story unfolds Adam and Eve are proposed with an opportunity to be like God and thus take from the fruit of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil which God Had forbidden them to do. The Devil proposed that what God had given Adam and Eve was insufficient hence the need to take from the forbidden tree. The story reveals how the Devil introduces the sin of covetousness or the act of fulfilling the disordered desires of the flesh. The Catechism expands on this notion of a disordered desire as follows,

The sensitive appetite leads us to desire pleasant things we do not have, e.g., the desire to eat when we are hungry or to warm ourselves when we are cold. These desires are good in themselves; but often they exceed the limits of reason and drive us to covet unjustly what is not ours and belongs to another or is owed to him.^[2]  

The last line of this specific Catechism article provides a clear context of how a person may behave if a desire is not met. The act of reason becomes disassociated from the carnal desire and introduces other vices into this human drama, one vice in particular is being resentful. The act of resentfulness can be defined as being jealous, discontent, envious of what others have, or simply ungrateful of what you have. These vices reveal the nature of our current human state, the daily and visible battle between vice over virtue, and good versus evil. More specifically we encounter a spiritual and moral tug-of-war where the ideal act of faith is to develop a healthy and active sacramental relationship with Jesus Christ. The premise of this relationship is to lead to a final encounter of joy with God in heaven.

A joyful path requires that a person dispel and remove anything that may hinder his relationship with Christ. This act of faith challenges the person to engage the world not through a humanistic lens but through the lens of faith revealed by God through His Son Jesus Christ. The journey toward experiencing the eternal gift of joy with God requires that we choose to live a virtue-driven life. As mentioned earlier, the sin of resentment directly challenges the desire for heavenly joy which can be further defined as coveting which would go against the ninth and tenth commandments, being ungrateful for what you have, or putting on a false face toward someone because you resent who they are or what they represent. A resentful attitude can convey an act of jealousy, hatred, or bitterness toward someone. The entire practice of expressing resentment is rooted in a desire to be greater than someone else regardless of the means to achieve it. This unholy act mimics the resentment expressed by the Devil toward Adam and Eve whom God made in his image and likeness.

St. Augustine provides us with context on why we should not underestimate the dangers of a resentful attitude, on how we can overcome it,

We fight one another, and envy arms us against one another.… If everyone strives to unsettle the Body of Christ, where shall we end up? We are engaged in making Christ’s Body a corpse.… We declare ourselves members of one and the same organism, yet we devour one another like beasts.^[3]

 It is important to note just how diabolical any form of resentment can be because of its premise to attack the dignity of the human person. There is a certain sense of gratification in relishing the misery of others but at what expense? This is the premise behind any form of resentment when it goes beyond being denied something and exhibits a desire to seek grave harm upon your neighbor, leading to mortal sin. The battle to destroy resentment as expressed through the various covetous desires of envy, jealousy, and hatred can be won through an act of the will driven by the virtue of humility and ordered toward the good of the person and yourself. The gift of humility serves as the greatest weapon against any resentful act. Actively practicing the virtue of humility serves as the spiritual antidote to avoid breaking the ninth and tenth commandments and view the good in others.

The Catechism quoting St. John Chrysostom provides us with a fitting process of combating resentful behavior in the following way,

Would you like to see God glorified by you? Then rejoice in your brother’s progress and you will immediately give glory to God. Because his servant could conquer envy by rejoicing in the merits of others, God will be praised.^[4]

The following prayer from St. Bernard of Clairvaux may serve you well in the temptation to develop a resentful attitude or worse yet, an identity synonymous with resentfulness,

There are those who seek knowledge to be known by others; that is vanity. There are those who seek knowledge in order to serve; that is Love. The three most important virtues are humility, humility, and humility. God will either give us what we ask, or what He knows to be better for us.

St. Bernard of Clairvaux